Wine Time, Wine 'o Clock, Sound Familiar? by Susie Rose
For many mothers, this is a big highlight in their day, a way to unwind or some 'me time' after a busy day of toddler wrangling or boss strangling. But what happens when the lines blur and your little friend that gets you through becomes something that controls you? Or prevents you from having other interests that could be your true passion? For many mums, this is becoming their reality and one drink becomes multiple, their little friend becomes their worst enemy and things start to unravel. There must be another way. I hear many mum friends say this to me week after week which leads me to write this article. I believe that creating a new mama ritual, full of self care, is where it’s at.
After the kids dinner and bath, I ask my children and husband the same 3 questions every night - What was your most favorite thing about today? What was your least favorite thing about today? What big feelings did I have today? Given my youngest is just under 2, my 6 year old always answers for him with some pretty hilarious responses. This allows us to connect and reflect on the day, ready to wind down for bedtime.
Mindfulness and meditation has been key in my parenting journey. Finding a way to make time for this can seem impossible but it really pays dividends! The Insight Timer App has become a part of my daily ‘wind down without wine’ ritual.
As a non drinker of 9 years, there’s been a big lesson in understanding why I personally struggle to unwind naturally like some kind of spiritual superwoman, and it truly is because sitting with myself and my fast moving mind creates anxiety (and that shit makes me uncomfortable!). The mind ticks over, the endless to do list starts circulating my brain, and suddenly Mary O’Grady not playing handstands with me when I was 5 seems to really piss me off! And when I feel uncomfortable, I want to get rid of it FAST. So, when my little ones go down to bed, I disconnect from technology, run a bath with essential oils (I’m a lavender nut), do some reading, pour a big cup of tea in my favourite non-child proof cup then curl up in my daggy pyjamas with some chocolate. If I have hubby or someone to watch the babes, I’ll go to a yoga and meditation class, play a team sport or catch up with a girlfriend for dinner or ice cream.
At the end of the day, self care is big big stuff for us mamas. It keeps us sane and helps us show up for life as our very best self. The beauty of sitting with myself without distraction is a beautiful thing today and I am able to say I cherish my own company.
Waking up feeling fresh, rested, sans hangover is pretty special too. So whatever self care looks like for you, keep it as a priority, put an evening ritual in place and watch new passions roll into your life...
Susie is a Sydney based mama of two beautiful boys. Passionate about womens wellbeing, conscious parenting, meditation and mindfullness, she writes about all this and more on her blog Take The Long Way Home.